It takes imagination.

The Nuvaring Before I got married, I went to the student health center for a pre-marriage gynecology appointment. I was a student at Brigham Young University (BYU), 20 and a virgin. I didn’t think of myself as prude or naive, but I was probably both of those things. Raised in the conservative Mormon faith, I…

Read More

A few things I know.

Sometimes when I get quiet here it’s because I feel like I don’t know anything. Nothing. And that’s not completely true. So here’s a list of a few things I do know.  I know if you are looking for sea glass on the beach, the best place to find it is in the patches of…

Read More

Tis the Damn Season

Do I need to rethink my entire life?… Or is it just the holidays? I found myself texting this to a friend who casually asked me how it was going?  Not good. Not good at all.  I mean, there are good things happening. But I think I wandered into the holidays a little off kilter.…

Read More

Hello, Righteous Rant

Learning to be conscious through a travel delay in a pandemic year, while mercury is in retrograde.

Read More

Burn the Box! A Diet Coke Story

Food programs and thought work can strip away the bullshit reasons we give ourselves for eating and drinking the things we do. So do the food programs, do the thought work but let it bring you to consciousness. See the box, feel the box… then burn it!

Read More

May Day and MAYDAY!

I find that life keeps teaching me about these paradoxes—two things that shouldn’t go together but certainly do. Two things that should contradict each other, but both are true. It’s as if life keeps saying to me Yes, AND….

Read More

Waking up

I’m just waking up this morning.  I heard River get up out of bed and walk through the house.  Then he climbed back into bed, ate a little dry cereal from the bowl he requested last night and he’s been quiet for a while now.  I have been mulling over this question of how to…

Read More

There is beauty in the wobble.

Saul was one of the first patients in San Diego to scream at me.  I remember the first time seeing him.  I went into the field with my nurse to see patients in their homes.  We came to his independent living facility (ILF), which was house in a poorer neighborhood in San Diego.  I followed…

Read More

Practice makes practice

When I was first learning to surf, my experienced-surfer friend, Clare, encouraged me to practice my pop-ups.  She recommended lying on my stomach on the living room floor and practicing the process of paddling, then pushing up and popping up.  The pop up is important in surfing and something most beginner surfers struggle with.  It’s…

Read More

Just in case you ever feel ungrateful

I’m going to let you in on a little secret.  I’m not thankful.  At least, I’m not thankful for probably 95% of my day.  I don’t walk around in a cloud of gratitude and satisfied bliss.  For all my talk about mindfulness and the positive spin I work to put on my life, I spend…

Read More