It takes imagination.

The Nuvaring Before I got married, I went to the student health center for a pre-marriage gynecology appointment. I was a student at Brigham Young University (BYU), 20 and a virgin. I didn’t think of myself as prude or naive, but I was probably both of those things. Raised in the conservative Mormon faith, I…

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Something good :)

Writing poetry about hard things is easy in a way. But, what about that whisper from inside that says good things are coming? The things you’ve waited for, even silently, as they seemed too big to speak? They are in motion. They are nearly here. All you must do is keeping going. Keep crossing that…

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Who is Heavenly Mother?

Now that I better understand the feminine divine, I see that, because of her nature, she doesn’t fit easily into organized religion. She is too big and complicated for that. There are no instructions for breathing! How would you teach someone to inhale? Yet, I notice very quickly when I am becoming oxygen-deprived.

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A few things I know.

Sometimes when I get quiet here it’s because I feel like I don’t know anything. Nothing. And that’s not completely true. So here’s a list of a few things I do know.  I know if you are looking for sea glass on the beach, the best place to find it is in the patches of…

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Moving on.

Sometimes you get an email on a random Tuesday that’s really a box of venom and darkness. And it’s from someone you can’t block. So you write. Not back to them. But to yourself. Just because you disgust one person, doesn’t mean you are disgusting. You are light. You are fire. Burn, baby. Moving on.…

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A new direction

I’ve been mulling it over and I’ve decided to take a slightly new direction in this space. You can still expect essays but I’m going to put a little more emphasis on poetry and art and creativity in general. And joy in the midst of life that’s always shifting and challenging and sometimes just shitty.…

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Seventy

I talked to my dad twice yesterday because it was his 70th birthday, and I couldn’t be there to make him a chocolate sheet cake and spell out 7-0 with candles (because 70 candles would poke too many holes in that delicious frosting!) But that’s probably why I woke up this morning thinking about him.…

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New Year! New You?

New Year! New You? The daylight begins to spread slightly father into the edges of the day. Still, it’s cold. I don’t like how my body looks, How it feels. I don’t like how my brain is moving, Either creeping in a carb-laden haze, Or ping-ponging between things that might lift me from misery: a…

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Tis the Damn Season

Do I need to rethink my entire life?… Or is it just the holidays? I found myself texting this to a friend who casually asked me how it was going?  Not good. Not good at all.  I mean, there are good things happening. But I think I wandered into the holidays a little off kilter.…

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Meditation: The Mad-Morning Problem

I used to write a lot about meditative practice and it can look many different ways. Walking, yoga, transcendental meditation, washing the dishes, taking a bath—these are all meditative practices I have leaned on heavily to get through these past few years.  I was facing my own dark night of the soul. I like Mark…

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